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Posts Tagged ‘loop’

Not a soul passes by but me

cradled on this steel machine

hugging the asphalt hard

chase the broken lines

fading into the infinite sky.

 

I see the tyre burning marks

like tattoos criss-crossing,

shifts of directions of going

and coming into your life.

 

A rugged kind of art

you have mastered

with speed. I surrender

to freedom, leaving

traces indelibly

creating loops-

togetherness

under heat

pressed

suffocated

in our bodies.

 

Raw, savagely

carefree.

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Here, in the box are things that you left me.

It’s been years I kept them hidden under

my bed. Should I throw it away? A burden

 

that I should burn it aflame with the world

like this tongue of hatred growing each day.

Oh sadness, it lingers through days like rain.

 

I have learned to befriend loneliness. I am

a castaway and a stranger to my own skin.

Chained to asking myself of what, why or how-

 

I build myself a wall of defense in silence

shielding me from these ghosts of abandon

and fear. Believing I have moved on but no.

 

I ran away as fast as I could in circles

until the soles of my feet bleed in despair.

I hated you and I should tell you that, now.

 

The blue light to my cigarette starts another

round of stinging away this loneliness

floating in loops through the night’s surreal air.

 

The beads begin forming in my mugs of beer

unknowingly- which of those are my sweat or tears-

blurred in the sad memory that you left me.

 

Remind me of things in that box of dreams,

by the time I know it, smashed to the floor

again. Made me satisfied to learn emptiness.

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Still.

There are unspoken

words left unwritten.

Thread of thoughts

broken.  Unsure loops.

Scribbling faint lines.

Curving, arching,

shaking. Unsharpened

slow and slipping.

This pencil stabs

a heart. Fragile bleeding

through teardrops

and graphite smudges

leaving grey notes.

To long lonely days

against whiteness

of a blank page.

Still.

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Mid-air  in my waking dream

are clouds and clouds away.

Like migratory creatures

homing their way into

transient frontiers.

Lulled by the rhythms

of the humming steel.

It churns anxiously, and

earnestly of home.

 

While the hands of time

back paces into

a counterclockwise.

The book of days

Suddenly flipped

to a journey of old memories.

Of  some silky threads

of years slipped through

in a hindsight.  As if

I didn’t left yesterday.

 

Then, something in me

fluttered like a fly.

Or is it really?

Touching down

this imagination to a farce.

 

As I watch the blue sea

became the bleakest

monotony of rust-colored roofs.

And the bumpy runway

made me remember

of the past.  That is much more likely-

today.  When nothing ever happened

to the ones I left behind- yesterday.

 

The gossamer of traffic.

Life entangled mazes

survival in the loop.

Sleep walking and heady

as the smog filtered

in my nostrils.

A reality I denied to believe.

Have I gone too far?

Too fast. Too soon.

As if I didn’t left?

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